SkimTheFat Your Guide to Skateboarding Videos
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Useless:
What's the dumbest thing ever invented? (1076 votes)

Scooters: 9.3%
Skate stopper: 45.4%
Fruitboots: 10.5%
Toilet paper: 3.8%
Cops: 14.8%
Bridge bolts: 3.4%
Wheels as big as your bearings: 12.7%

How to Piss:
What is the best way to take a piss? (1059 votes)

In a cheetah's mouth: 21.4%
Sitting down: 12.7%
Backwards: 5.7%
While pinching your foreskin: 8.7%
During an erection: 27.2%
Lying on your back: 7.5%
Inside a body cavity: 16.9%

Pick ur Nose:
Do you pick your nose and if so, how do you do it? (1027 votes)

Full on raw knuckle deep: 44.7%
With the pinky: 15.2%
With a tissue covering your finger: 12.3%
I just suffer: 8.0%
With a spoon: 19.9%

Bam Bam:
If you saw Bam Margera in person, what would you do? (720 votes)

Give him a hug: 4.3%
Dry hump him: 5.0%
Tell him he is a sellout: 16.8%
Call him a poser: 6.5%
Ask him how he is a pro: 25.0%
Beat his ass: 27.4%
Compliment him: 15.0%

Airwolf vs. Blue Thunder:
Which one of these stupid helicopters from the 80s would win in a dogfight? (294 votes)

Airwolf: 57.5%
Blue Thunder: 42.5%

The A-Team:
If you were throwing a birthday party, which A-Team member would you pick to attend? (404 votes)

Hannibal: 13.6%
B.A. Baracus: 40.3%
Face: 9.9%
Murdock: 36.1%

Beat Em Up:
If you saw these fools alone in a dark alley, which would you like to beat the shit out of most? (425 votes)

George Bush: 6.6%
George W. Bush: 52.5%
Jeb Bush: 3.3%
Barbara Bush: 5.9%
Chad Muska: 31.8%

Classic 80s Flicks:
Of the following movies from the 80s, which one ranks as the most classic? (248 votes)

Revenge of the Nerds: 12.1%
Commando: 7.3%
Weird Science: 6.9%
Real Genius: 3.6%
Road House: 3.6%
Fast Times at Ridgemont High: 20.6%
PeeWee's Big Adventure: 16.9%
The Search for Animal Chin: 29.0%

Which 40 oz.?:
If you had to pick from one of these 40s, which would you choose first? (603 votes)

Olde English 800: 26.7%
Mickies: 17.9%
King Cobra: 13.1%
Camo: 1.2%
Colt 45: 33.3%
Little Kings: 1.7%
Schlitz: 6.1%

Win $1,000,000:
For a million bucks, which of the following options would you do first? (1474 votes)

Drink a glass of Danzig's piss: 9.5%
Swallow your own cum: 39.5%
French kiss your mom: 6.5%
Taste Ali Boulala's poo: 4.1%
Take a Pedro Martinez fastball in the nuts: 2.6%
Suck on George Bush's ballsack: 2.4%
You sick fuck! None of the above!: 35.3%

How do you like it trimmed?:
Of these 4 ways to trim a ladies bush, which do you prefer? (1190 votes)

Brazillian Wax (completely shaved): 58.2%
The Hitler (a small square): 8.3%
Landing Pad (a strip of hair): 24.0%
Hippie Style (let the pubes fly!): 9.5%

Splatter Paint:
What’s the gnarliest part of having diarrhea? (1225 votes)

Splattering the bottom of the lid: 17.6%
Swamp gas stink: 11.6%
Squeezing out a spoonful in your pants: 17.9%
B-Hole on fire: 21.6%
When you see blood: 31.3%

Got Grip?:
Which of the following would make the best griptape? (1388 votes)

A Big Wad of Gum: 3.1%
2 Sided Duct Tape: 15.2%
Sand & Glue: 58.9%
Fossilized Poo Crumbs: 10.3%
Pixie Sticks & Peanut Butter: 12.5%

Mmmmmm, That's Good Piss:
What is the best time of day to take a piss? (1006 votes)

In the morning: 49.6%
At night: 5.3%
After drinking a 40: 27.8%
In your bed: 8.3%
After getting your jams on: 8.9%

Lamer than Lame:
Of these 6 things, which one is the lamest? (1365 votes)

Tech Decks: 6.0%
Rollerbladers: 27.6%
The X-Games: 7.5%
Old Spice commercials: 8.0%
George Bush Jr.: 39.9%
Joe Millionaire: 11.0%

Don't Get Caught:
What's the worse thing you could be caught doing? (1075 votes)

Stealing a nudie mag: 2.3%
Riding fruitboots: 22.6%
Masturbating in public: 23.8%
Smelling your own farts: 3.1%
Smelling mom's undies: 48.2%

Up Yours:
What would be the worst thing to put up your butt? (1015 votes)

A sweet potato: 14.9%
Bar of soap: 14.1%
Banana: 6.5%
Cucumber: 20.8%
Bottle of Pabst: 29.1%
A Charleston Chew: 14.7%

Damn You:
Of the following options, which is the best method to tell someone off? (1063 votes)

The finger: 43.8%
The Italian chin scrape: 11.6%
The ball grab: 24.4%
Stick your tongue out: 4.0%
A full moon: 16.2%

Foulest Habit:
Of the following habits, which is the lamest to have? (1065 votes)

Nose picking: 5.5%
Crotch itching: 5.7%
Poo tasting: 61.6%
Showering: 11.8%
Yodeling: 15.3%

Best Skater's Injury:
Out of these five injuries, which would you like to have most while skating? (1131 votes)

Nut cracker: 15.1%
Shinner: 55.6%
Busted skull: 7.4%
Dislocated shoulder: 10.9%
Blown out ankle: 11.0%

The Dumbest Poll Known to Man:
What is the best thing to wipe your ass with when you're out camping? (1205 votes)

Toilet paper: 42.2%
A leaf: 12.7%
Your socks: 11.9%
Tent: 7.6%
A glove: 3.2%
Your hand: 22.2%
Poison Ivy: 0.3%

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A face only a cousin would love. Machoman Says...
"Your momma's like a vaccum cleaner. She sucks, blows and gets laid in the closet. Ooohhh yeahhh."


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